Do You Actually Care About Your Team?

Leadership is influence. At the individual level, it’s a function of two things: skills and motivation. For better or for worse, our intent largely changes our approach to influence.

The spectrum of influence

As a leader, what tools do you have to make an impact? Picture a spectrum that runs from manipulation (covert influence coupled with negative intent) on one side, to coercion (overt influence coupled with negative intent) on the other. These two failure patterns are all-too-common gutters of influence that leaders rely on to get things done, either through deception or through force. These are abdications of leadership where, in both cases, intent and motivation are low.

So, then, what’s in the middle? Persuasion is in the middle. Encouragement. Inspiration. Coaching. Logic. Data. Empathy. Listening. When coupled with positive intent, these are healthy applications of a leader’s influence that can empower a team to grow beyond your expectations, and theirs.

As leaders, we need to develop the type of intent necessary to have healthy influence. We need to ask ourselves the question: do I actually care about my team? And if so, is that evident in my behavior, values, and interactions?

What’s missing from traditional EQ frameworks

In many mainstream emotional intelligence frameworks, the measurement of social regard is either deficient or non-existent. This is incredibly dangerous. Why? Because behavior doesn’t just exist. A person’s intent and motivations drive it. In other words, how you think about yourself and others has a profound influence on how you interact with those around you.

If we don’t account for the fundamental beliefs a person has about themselves and others, we can easily promote, support, and encourage leaders with manipulative tendencies. Emotional intelligence frameworks that can’t account for the motivation and intent side of influence are broken from the get-go.

The full guide walks through the EQindex™ framework, which divides emotional intelligence into 6 domains — self-regard, self-awareness, and self-management on the internal side, and social regard, social awareness, and social management on the external side — with 5 skills assigned to each. It then breaks down the five skills of social regard (compassion, empathy, respect, interest, and social efficacy), with a concrete practice for each one so your care for your team shows up in how you actually lead.